It’s just been confirmed: Brendan’s spinal fusion operation is definitely going to happen this summer. Deep breath. It’s really going to happen.
Today, I met with the Orthopedic surgeon to review the pre-op testing done on Brendan Bjorn in February. We also reviewed the x-rays taken today of his spine, which show a marked increase in curvature since February. Urgent just became more urgent.
What does this news mean?
It means I have just TWO MONTHS to secure a suitable bungalow in which to continue caring 24/7 for my son once he comes home from hospital after his spinal fusion.
Just two months. I have been crying for over an hour now as it is all just hitting me.
To say I am experiencing high levels of anxiety is an understatement. Sheer panic is more like it. I absolutely cannot stomach the thought of Brendan Bjorn not being allowed back home after the operation because we currently live in an old, unsuitable – and therefore, unsafe – rental house! That just can’t be allowed to happen! Declan is in bits at the thought of it and I am having anxiety attacks nearly every day. I’m incredibly afraid about the operation. It’s a very risky surgery, but it will help save his life. The alternative is his spine continuing to crush his internal organs. So, it must be done despite the risks, despite my fears. The housing situation merely compounds that fear.
My little family is in turmoil and I’m fighting like hell to stop it all from spinning out of control.
To be honest, we are all suffering in our own ways.
It should be enough that I have to prepare for the fact that in two months, my first born child will undergo a very serious, major operation. But no parent should also have to simultaneously, frantically, try to secure a suitable forever home in which to continue caring for their medically fragile child 24 hours a day. That is the way it is, though. There will be no home loan I can obtain. There will be no social housing given in time. Those are the facts. So, I will try to prepare myself…and both of my sons…for this serious operation on Brendan, while also desperately trying to raise funds to buy that forever, modified, safe, suitable bungalow for him.
Two months. That’s not much time. But it must be done.