Sometimes all it takes is a moment

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I fell in love today. All it took to catch my eye was a series of 18 colourful photos on a website. Just the right size – not too big, not too small. Yes, just right. A little bungalow with a lovely manicured front garden, a large back garden for Declan to play in, and just 10 minutes from my best friend of 22 years and 15 minutes from what would be Brendan Bjorn’s new special needs school. Yes, it was love at first sight.

And all it took was a moment.

I fell off the unstable, unsafe portable wheelchair ramp that is precariously perched on cement blocks going out my front door today. The bag of rubbish in one hand went flying as I landed down on the tarmac drive somehow with my elbow first. I’ll survive, of course, and I’m sure my once-athletic ego is more bruised than anything else. But it reminded me of how it is far from safe – and how I have to get the boys into a proper, safe, long term home as soon as possible. I could have been taking Brendan Bjorn out of the house when I fell, and that thought doesn’t sit well with me.

And all it took was a moment.

I fell asleep last night worried about the pressure sore that has once again broken through Brendan’s tender skin. As I type this, he lays in his bed somewhat on his side so to avoid any contact that could make the sore worse again. He has a new wheelchair seat designed for pressure sores. He hasn’t been in it that much, in fact. So, last night as I fell asleep, I lay there wondering how did this happen? Why did the sore return so quickly and for no obvious reason?

And all it took was a moment. 

I fell into a dark place today, feeling hopeless as every person with the power to do something about our housing situation has, in the past few days, only said that they couldn’t do anything to help. I know different. I know all it would take is a bit of outside-the-box thinking and the will to do it, and it could be done. I’ve spent hours this week emailing and phoning people, organisations, government officials, and nothing has progressed. So, as I sat here in the quiet this morning, the worry and stress had me wanting to just give up trying.

And all it took was a moment.

I fell in love today with this adorable little bungalow surrounded by a beautiful garden. Do I have the money to buy it or the ability to get a mortgage loan? No. But I can dream about it. I can picture Brendan Bjorn sitting on the wooden deck in the back garden, laughing while he watches his little brother Declan kick his soccer ball from one end to the other. I can imagine having friends over, sitting outside on that same wooden deck, the BBQ going, the music playing, and the good memories being made. Yes, I can choose to dream.

All it took was a moment and I felt the inspiration to keep fighting for that dream.

 

back garden

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